What makes you jump into action?
Necessity
Need
Desperation
Desire
Force
Knowing what you want?
What makes you break through roadblocks?
Necessity
Belief
Seeing options
Inner drive
Courage
Envisaging the goal?
What motivates you?
The risk of losing something or someone
Having no other choice
Knowing what you want
A mentor or a champion
A dare
A reward
Setting a measure of accountability?
What are the implications of the above choices, for you?
For example, under what circumstances have you been ‘forced’ to jump into action? How did that work for you? Or, how could ‘envisaging a specific goal’ (or not having one) play out for you when faced with a roadblock? Or, in what way could having someone champion you and your goal help you achieve it?
How in tune are you with your inner mechanisms that propel you to take action or that grind you to a halt?
What have your responses to these questions made you more aware of?
If you’re facing an issue that involves having to make a pivotal decision and you find yourself at a crossroad, how do you proceed?
How much time are you spending thinking about it?
Which of the following comes close to describing how you feel?
“I feel frustrated because I don’t know where to begin.”
“I fear how the decision I make will affect my future.”
“I’m stuck.”
“I have friends and family who have been in similar situations that are helping me sort through things, but I still feel like I’m not seeing everything. I’m not at ease.”
“I feel overwhelmed – so many questions are popping into my head.”
“I don’t know what to do and feel very much like everything rests on my shoulders.”
“I am putting off thinking about it.”
“I’ve decided to give up on it, I don’t see how it will work but something continues to haunt me.”
Making difficult choices or forming value judgments will have either positive or negative consequences. They will impact you and those around you in some way – and for some time to come. So you will likely want to be sure that what you do or say will come from a place of clarity and peace of mind – which comes from knowing what you need to know, deciding what you want and then taking action.
Feeling that clarity and peace of mind can be likened to what a member of a jury might have to feel before announcing a verdict. The guided process leading up to a jury’s final decision consists of gathering fact-based evidence and presenting that evidence where it is heard and may be countered with further evidence.
Imagine for a moment that you are a jury member and there is evidence brought forth that casts doubt in your mind. Until that doubt has been put to rest, how do you feel?
How would you feel if the other members of the jury were ready to pronounce judgment before the evidence was all in or if you personally saw holes in the testimony? How would the uncertainty of being left with unanswered questions and being aware of what’s at stake play out in your mind? What would you need in order to feel at peace with your final decision on the matter?
At times it may feel like you’re in the midst of a trial because the decision you have to make feels like it will change your world or someone else’s in one way or another. Gathering evidence and gaining clarity when making a personal decision, often translates to understanding all the facts surrounding feelings, thoughts and beliefs – of all parties concerned.
A professionally guided process is key to feeling like you have thoroughly weighed all the ‘evidence’.
Know the facts – not “hearsay” – so that you may, without reasonable doubt, state your verdict on any matter and release from your shoulders, the burden of prolonged inquiry, guilt or indecisiveness. Make resolutions and choices that you can live with.
What a celebratory weekend we just had! It began with the opening of the Winter Olympic Games in Vancouver on Friday February 12th, was followed by Valentines Day on Sunday and officially in some parts of the world, Family Day on Monday.
Aside from having the common focus of ‘celebration’, what other ‘commonalities’ do you share on each of these occasions?
If you make the effort to reflect on just how much each of the above fit into all three occasions, you just may end up feeling like an Olympian yourself!
~Lesia S.
There are a great number of factors and circumstances that may cause irritability. Getting to the heart of what is causing it is likely to involve some searching. The question is if you want to start by calming down that irritability and preventing it from escalating, what can you do?
Some of you may relate to this:
Let’s say you’ve made a choice in your past that put a strain on your finances and you vowed that you’d never do anything to put yourself in that position again. A substantial period of time elapses and your finances are starting to look pretty good then BAM, you do it again. You have a slipup that puts another strain or complication on managing your finances. Maybe you saw an opportunity to increase your income with what looked like a promising venture at the time. However today you’re mentally beating yourself up and asking why this happened again – which is making you feel irritable.
Here’s one perspective:
The ‘slipup’ put a strain on managing your finances much like, for example, if you went to the gym and lifted a heavier weight that put a strain on your muscles.
What happens when you lift a heavier weight?
Your muscles ache for a bit longer then they’re back to normal. The next time you work out you are more aware of that heavy weight and avoid it because you remember the pain you felt last time. What else can happen?
A year later, you’ve been exercising regularly and you’re feeling physically fit so you decide to give the heavier weight another go. What happens next?
1. In the next few days you find that your muscles ached a little less but they ached nevertheless, more than you like, or
2. You feel the same pain as the first time and feel irritated that you pushed your muscles too hard but at the same time notice that you didn’t hurt your muscles to any significant degree, or
3. You find that, although lifting weights is important to toning your muscles, the weight you are lifting does not have to be that heavy and you will still get the same toned results – with less or no pain.
~Whether you can relate to this particular example and the three outcomes or not, generally what do you come away with?
~If you feel that it’s created somewhat of a calming affect on you, what specific way of thinking makes that happen?
~How can you apply this way of thinking to other areas of your life?
Jingle bells ringing
Line-ups at the check out
Strings of colored lights, sparkling angels, stars and Santa’s
Overheated babies
Frustrated Mommies
Perplexed Daddies
Overspending
Parking lot fiascos
Tempers flaring
Christmas concerts
Winter break
Day Dreaming
Locking keys in the car
Menu planning
Trimming the tree
Cookie baking
Making wishes
Sending greetings
Dealing with fender benders
Christmas music
Singing in the Church choir
Gift giving
Drinking eggnog, plain and spiked
Fireplaces roaring
Party going
Reminiscing
Last minute shopping
Volunteering
Getting speeding tickets
Thanking
Observing traditions
Attending Religious Services
Fundraising
Hungry
Sharing
Donating
Overeating
Dieting
Deep breathing
Vacationing
Praying
Lives beginning
Lives ending
Re-connecting
Separating
Celebrating
These are just a few random sights, sounds and experiences shared by people all over the world at this time of year. No doubt you will agree, some we can do without, however magically in some way and especially if we look for it, the true spirit of the season is captured in the end. How would you define the true spirit of the season? How will you make it happen?
______________________
~We are thankful and proud to be able to partner with our clients in achieving the best possible personal experience that life can provide, one that is not only rewarding, happy and fulfilling but has a positive ripple affect on others along the way.
In this spirit we wish you and your families the very best of what the Holiday Season has to offer and most importantly, all of what you personally want to experience.
Ben is a successful executive who enjoys music and singing. He is also a family man with a wife and three children who are all musical in some way. Together, Ben, his wife and children have accomplished many endeavors over the years individually and as a family unit – endeavors they are very proud of.
Some time ago, Ben went in to work and was told that it was his last day.
At first he was stunned. His wife shed some tears. Later, after the initial blow to the family and the questions that swirled about, they did what many in similar positions must do – they embarked on a new path.
Embarking on a new path meant that Ben had to do some soul searching. That meant answering a lot of questions about who he was, who he is and who he wanted to be as he moved forward in his life and specifically career. He questioned what choices he wanted to make now that he had been put in a position he did not choose to be in.
It has been a good while since this happened to Ben and his family. You might be surprised by the revelations Ben has had since that fateful day.
He decided to probe his thought processes during the years just prior to being ‘let go’ and as he put it, “be brutally honest with myself”. He was surprised to find that he was subconsciously preparing to move in a new direction months before he left.
Over the years he recalled, his passion for music and singing had not subsided. In fact it continued to flourish. In his spare time he spent hours rehearsing for fundraising events at which he performed and thoroughly enjoyed.
He realized that as much as he was seriously engaged, dedicated and productive in his executive career, part of him and his thought process would be on music and performing. In fact, over the years he had been slowly purchasing expensive audio/electronic equipment and often times by chance, began connecting more and more with people who were involved in the music industry.
-A question you might ask is – was he subconsciously preparing for a new beginning and a somewhat new direction?
-What did he truly want?
-What is Ben doing now?
Today Ben is doing all the things he loves. He is working at a job that engages his specific expertise in business and at the same time lends him the space and time to nourish and reap the rewards of a passion that wouldn’t let go.
When asked, “What do you think the future holds?” the response is, “It looks promising!”
Miley Cyrus sings about one’s journey in life or ‘the climb’ in one of her latest songs. She sings, “there’s always gonna be another mountain….aint about how fast I get there, aint about what’s waiting on the other side, it’s the climb”, and many of you have heard the adage about success being the journey, not the destination.
How do you perceive success?
How has your climb proven to be successful?
How hard or easy is it for you to recognize your successes?
What makes your success different from someone else’s?
What makes your personal journey unique?
Have you ever thought about what makes up a personal journey?
Is it what you see and how you see it?
How you feel and how you want to feel?
How you think?
What you want and how much you want it?
What you do and when you do it?
All of the above?
What else…?
~It’s your climb and your success, then what would stop you from making it your intention to recognize and savor every well-earned moment of each and every personal success and use those celebratory moments to nourish and fuel your soul as you venture ahead?
Harold V. Melchert said it well –
Live your life each day, as you would climb a mountain. An occasional glance toward the summit keeps the goal in mind, But many beautiful scenes are to be observed from each new vantage point. Climb slowly, steadily, enjoying each passing moment; And the view from the summit will serve as a fitting climax for the journey.
What do you endeavor to do or to be and with how much passion?
The first part of that question when clearly and firmly defined is the first crucial step in the pursuit of that endeavor.
What is your endeavor?
To be happy again – What exactly does that mean?
Land a rewarding job that fits my lifestyle – What is your lifestyle?
Master a skill – What will that bring?
Conquer a struggle with weight – What will happen if you do?
Be the first person to…
Attain a career objective?
Win a scholarship?
Run the Boston Marathon?
Whatever the magnitude of your endeavor, knowing exactly what it is, wanting it and imprinting it in your mind, is one battle won. The next battle is becoming aware of the implications of actually succeeding. What will it bring? How will you feel?
The second half of the question is about the fuel or passion that will fire up your engine, the engine that will ultimately drive you to your destination or to succeed in your chosen endeavor.
But what is your fuel, your motivation?
Where will you get that fuel?
How do you assure that you will not run out of fuel before you reach your destination?
What do you think will determine how long it will take to get there?
Whether you wish to be the best person you can be, the best athlete or the best in your profession, the success of each endeavor however large or small, rests upon and will be the result of how much you want it and are prepared to reach and keep learning until you achieve it.
Success need not take as long as you may think.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I invite you to fire up your engines!
THE HARDER THE CONFLICT, THE MORE GLORIOUS THE TRIUMPH.
WHAT WE ATTAIN TOO CHEAPLY, WE ESTEEM TOO LIGHTLY;
IT IS ADVERSITY THAT GIVES EVERYTHING ITS VALUE.
-Thomas Payne
When asked to name a few things that she values Sheila replied, “My life, my family, my job, my shiny red mustang convertible, my house, my friends, taking vacations….
If you were asked the same question what would you say? What do you value?
How many of the things you truly value did you have to work for?
How hard were they to come by?
How much adversity did you have to endure?
Was what you attained worth the effort?
According to Sheila, nothing came easy. She struggled, stumbled, got up and stumbled again. Her relationships were volatile, little money in the bank and her vision of the future bleak. What she had in abundance was passion, will and courage. With professional support, conversation and guided process, she did a lot of soul searching and went through a great deal of personal growth, gained new insights into her life, forged ahead when she was in dire straits, took small steps and kept her attitude in check.
In a breakthrough moment, one that put it all in perspective for her, Sheila realized that she would not change a thing from her past. What she endured she feels provided her with the skills the wherewithal, the need, the ability to make informed choices and the vision to see, reach and achieve anything she decided and truly wanted. Sheila noticed that she attributed little value to the things that came too easily or were literally handed to her.
Sheila is a mature woman who now knows how to manage what ever life throws her way and feels that she will make mistakes but she will never fail because there are no failures only learning opportunities, challenges to overcome and potentially that much more to value.
Sheila is an inspiration and a success in her own right.
